Last week...

I am still floored by the class we had last week.As we walked into our classroom T. met us on the sidewalk and followed us to the door. She has recently moved outside the fence to the work release part of the prison. I congratulated her and told her this was a major accomplishment. She said that there was no hope for her when she got out; she was going to be sent to work release in the same town where she had used and abused drugs. In her mind she would either die or end up back at ICIW. Later after we circled up to read T. read an amazing piece of prose about her experience as a survivor of sexual abuse. R. reacted with some anger and one of our new students, D. offered support. I was more or less speechless.I crossed the circle and gave T. a hug. I hope it was the right thing to do. T. went on to make the most amazing progress on her painting. She was euphoric the entire night. I think it was a very cathartic evening for her. Students like T. make me realize one reason why this work is so important. There are so few outlets for expression. On another note we have two former lovers in our class together. They are at odds with one another and are now under "investigation" because one read a poem that the other thought might be about her somehow. Things can be so tender and there is really no way to escape from each other in such a small community. Heartbreak must be hell. Another student K. lost her long time partner. She finally was released after almost 9 years in prison. K. was a real trooper and came to class, but she was clearly depressed.
We started working on the paintings and I think our first bit was very successful. R. another student asked me a very strange question, "would you look up me on the internet to see what people have written about me?" I said I would rather not know and was she sure she really wanted to know?" This is never a good idea. Knowing about a crime is like opening Pandora's box. It can get in the way of doing good work and doing no harm. Sometimes it seems like people who are incarcerated want to see if you will still accept them in spite of their crime.Part of it is building trust, but it is certainly not the best way to go about it. If the relationships you build focus on the knowledge you bring and the projects that are happening in class then the relationship won't be nearly as tangled or complicated. It is important to spare yourself some distance.
After our experience last week with all of the stories related to rape and sexual abuse I decided to sign up for training with the Rape Victim Advocacy Program in Iowa city. Hopefully I will learn more about how to handle such delicate situations.
Rebecca and Jefri are going tomorrow nigh; I can't wait to hear about their evening.